A coroner's report on the death of originality, tone, taste, and the Oxford comma — all victims of the same crime
Asked for one idea. Received seventeen. Numbered. Bolded. With a "Bonus tip!" at the end nobody requested and no one will read.
"Certainly! Great question! Happy to help!" The AI has not once in its life been asked an ungreat question. Every query is a gift.
Four paragraphs of context before the actual answer. You asked what time it is. You will first learn the history of sundials.
Every AI startup homepage: floating orbs, sans-serif bold, "We're reimagining X." Nobody is reimagining anything. The orbs know.
"As an AI, I must note that…" followed by seventeen caveats so the pasta recipe cannot be held legally responsible for anything.
Suspiciously smooth skin. Eyes just slightly too wide. Teeth that have never known a dentist or biology. A smile from the void.
"I'm thrilled to share that after much reflection on my journey, I've realized that failure is just success wearing a trenchcoat. As Aristotle famously wrote in 340 BC, 'hustle is the language of champions.' This resonates deeply with my personal brand. Agree? Drop a 🔥 below. Let's connect and synergize going forward."